Thursday, February 17, 2011

Reflection of my days in Kanglung: Part Three

Me During my convocation in 2005
Long  brooding days of  my first year and swift passing days of my second year finally gave way for my  final and third year. The year in essence has indeed been a year of reflection its truest sense for me. 

Every evening when Sherubste rested in peace, I took a refuge in my room to  reflect on the days I spent as a careless fun loving lad. I also reflected on days when me and my friends alike went low in academics and high on love, football and laughter. 

I saw my first year elapse. I qualified for my second year with just marginal marks. A job invariably would demand supremacy in academic performance and not realizing the kind of fight I will have to put up later, I closed my first year chapter.

My second year was no different. I continued going low with my academics. If my first year was a disaster then my second year was mega disaster. The results were declared and to my dismay I stood and scored the lowest ever mark in the history of my academic performance. I failed in my computer paper and couldn't clear my Business mathematics. I scored lamenting 5 marks out of 50 in Business mathematics. Interestingly in the middle of this hue and cry, my consolidated mark sheet said different story all together. It said I scored 45 out of 50 and it obviously shocked the entire class. It became news in the college. I broke the college record in the paper. But that story as anticipated and expected didn't have a happy ending. I wrote an inquiry letter to the University through my department head. The University in turn responded with regret. The letter explicitly told me to read my mark as "05 and not as 45". 

With that note, it was not only  reflection of my merrier days but it was also a dawn of realization. with 2 additional paper to clear, the task called for more hard work. More work with my books meant lesser time for leisure.

I frequented study hall, and that time around it was for different reason. I had loads of books to refer and get myself out of the cobweb and dizzy lost days. I talked less and moved around less. I surely had Mountain to climb and thick socks to pull up.  I would  go out occasionally but would come back quick and fast to continue my  preparation for my final show down. In a months time I lost considerable amount of weight and I saw my self being reduced to a skinny young man with lots of bones on body and beards on my face. I was in to a very serious business and I wouldn't miss my class for any reason. I wouldn't even entertain to proxy for any one.  

Being a class representative, I had the liberty to go straight to our professors and request them to call off the classes. But with each passing day, the fantasy of calling off classes diminished. There was in fact need for extra classes!

Mid way through my final year, the tradition of the college took a full swing again. Tradition of endless dates among couples, endless pair ups and endless break ups, frequent birthday parties and frequent reunions swayed the life in Kanglung once again. Few of our friends were  even happily married and surprisingly even had children back home.

I would often go to my  Best friend cum professor's place to spend my weekends with him  either to help him in his household chores or to feed myself. We would spent sleepless nights discussing on various topics and take a week off from the college and visit my parents in the high up valleys of Shingkhar.  One day he asked me what my future plans were. He then went on to remind me  that in months time I would be thrown in the ocean of life's challenges and that I will have to swim on my own to get ashore. Those were indeed golden words form him, because I remember having no plan what so ever. 

If at all Sherubtse meant something, it was all about excellence. Let there be light and there was sherubtse in Bhutan. Intellectual womb of Sherubtse has produced some of the finest think tanks of Bhutan  and it embodied the "autobiography of our hopes". It was then I realized how fortunate I was to be there standing tall yet with attributes that far fell form what it actually demanded. I felt I was a frog without tongue and snake without tail.

The snake and frog like feeling however made me more manly. It gave me strength to fight back and took me back to the track. Finally I rediscovered my self; -a hard working and sincere learner who had unsataible desire for knowledge. Even though the moments lost could not be mended, I believe I could still live and make my remaining days a worth while one. I started to burn my mid night candle with all my heart. 

That year, one of my closest friend was unanimously elected as our Hostel Councillor and two of them moved to the councillor's room on the ground floor. They had the luxury of toilet inside unlike commoners who used common toilets. I stayed back and two of my nomad friends whom i met year ago joined me. (Jigme Thinley, present accounts officer in ECB and Phuntsho Dendup, present labour officer in MoLHR) we had a harmonious existence then. In the evening when we got together, both of them would have their own stories;- mostly love stories that invariably ended with failures.

I was finally in my 8th month of my final year, but I didn't know whether I really deserved to be treated that way. With my 2 second year paper still due meant that I risk being called back for my second year the next year. This created an enormous pressure on me.

The juniors treating the final year people and final year guys delivering their farewell speeches were at its hype. No matter what, I took part if i was invited and I kept a list of people who actually invited me. some 114 people graciously invited me to bid me farewell. Apart from that, first year and second year B.Com people also have the  tradition of  hosting grand farewell dinner for the final year B.Com people. As a senior and in a symbolic gesture of their respect for their elders, we were given a white scarf, which represented purity of thought and purity of action (meaning that all the jeers and nasty comments during their introductory nights were nothing but a tradition) I was touched and I regretted for having jeered during their introductory nites and welcome show. But on the lighter note, it was all about passing tradition and culture down the line, generation after generation. In essence it was about being Bhutanese, I guess.

With all my hard work and preparation, I did my examinations. I thought it went well. It surely did. I got through my back papers. Although it was not officially announced, I even topped in one of the papers of the third and final year. My hard work paid off and it was a sensational feeling of relief and joy. I was awarded  the certificate of B.Com Honors from Delhi University, which I believe was/is one of the best universities in world (because not many students, especially in economics and commerce scored good marks)

That was my life in Sherubtse College.

1 comment:

  1. I am in my third year now and everything you wrote is exactly being mirrored in my life right now - the drive to do better this time because you spoiled your previous semesters! I can realy relate.


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